Friday, June 26, 2015

Losing steam?

Going to retreat to my air conditioned bedroom and finish Gargoyle Dreams.  I should have a straight shot from here.  The story has been mapped out, though the particulars will no doubt surprise me as usual.

I sat down yesterday and wrote out a schedule for my writing.  Basically, the rest of this year is pre-programmed, and most of next year.  After that, I'm hoping to more or less alternate new stories with fixing up old stories.

Very ambitious.  Lots of books.

But I can also feel myself running out of steam a little.  I was maniacally focused there for one year, and damned focused for the next.  This feels more like a routine.  I think it can still happen because over the course of those two years, I became more proficient and effective.

Like an older athlete who makes up in experience what he's lost in speed.

I'm still committed to my five to seven year program, of which I'm more or less halfway through.  I just need to keep on keeping on.  Much like my experience with the store -- just hang in there through the ups and downs.  It only took 20 years to earn a profit and only 28 years to be able to get away from the store for longer than a couple of days.  But in the end, it worked.

The newness of writing is wearing off, but I've always kind of had an ability to renew my interest in whatever it is I'm doing.  I don't tend to go off and do something else, I just look for ways to rejuvenate what I'm already doing.

This is a true test of commitment, totally on my own head.  There is no outside demand, there is no one really paying attention.  This is when it really comes down to self-motivation, which I've always had.

I have faith that in the end, it will work.

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