Wednesday, September 11, 2013

Writing and my moods.

Was feeling depressed all day.  Which is actually unusual for me.  I generally have a pretty upbeat mood.  (I know, I know ... those who see me at the store might not think that, but over all --- yes, upbeat.)

I read the penultimate section of Led to the Slaughter to writer's group and you know what?  It was good.

Ginger made the comment that she had rolled her eyes at the idea of "Donner Party Werewolves" but that it wasn't a gimmick, that I was writing a serious survival story about people.

Well, yeah.  It isn't Snakes on a Plane.  It is the real story as best I can write it -- but, well, with werewolves.

I'm wondering if I haven't hurt the prospects of the book by playing up the sensational -- perhaps silly -- sounding premise. 

Anyway, came home feeling good about my writing again.

Also wrote a chapter of "As You Wish!" (which I have decided needs an exclamation mark in the title.)

The thing about writing is that it isn't dependent on mood.  One of the few things I do that isn't dependent on mood.  I can write depressed or happy and everywhere between.  I remove myself from whatever is happening, good, bad or indifferent.

On the other hand, writing usually makes me feel good. 

In fact, I'm convinced that getting serious about writing helped bring me out of my decade long clinical depression in the 70's.

I'm not sure why.  Mostly because it took me out of myself, made me think about something else for long periods of time.  And because I got a feeling of accomplishment out of it.  And maybe because being creative is just good for my overall well being.

The only downside is that it isolates me.  After stewing in dark thoughts all day, the minute I started to talking to Ginger and Gary and Linda at the group, I started to feel better.

I've always intended to keep working at the store, whether I need to for the money or not.  (Need to being relative.)  Maybe not as much, but I still need that human contact.  I have all kinds of people at the store I know and like -- they are my friends, if you will.

But writing is also important, and I'm still struggling to find that balance.

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