What numbskull decided it was a good idea to close the streets downtown at 1:00? Somebody please tell me how a bunch of bikers whizzing around in front of my store are supposed to help my business?

The tail of promotion is wagging the dog of business.

I was asking John, my next door jewelry neighbor, if after 3 years he still thinks all the street closures are a good idea.

"Well, they definitely don't help on the days they take place, but they bring people downtown."

I give up. Does anyone have any proof that is true? We know for a certain fact that blocking customers from your store isn't good for business on the day they do it. We are supposed to take it on faith alone that it's good for business in the future?

We are training people to come downtown for special events; but I'm convinced that most of these people don't come back downtown until the next special event.

The streets of downtown Bend in July and August would be full of shoppers without getting in their way -- because the shops themselves would attract them. Not the wine-tasting, cheese-eating, folk-singing, clown-suited outsiders who we invite to distract our customers and steal our business.

Let's see, we pay full rent, and not cheap rent, all year long and here we finally have the weekends where we might benefit and instead we invite a bunch of outside merchants to set up in front of our store for a nominal fee and steal our customers?

Huh? What the hell am I missing?

Yeah, yeah. It promotes downtown. It bring people downtown.

Prove it. I don't believe it.