Saturday, September 5, 2009


This seems to be one of those points in my life where CHANGE is coming at me from every direction. Not all of it negative.

Most people probably would've phrased it, "not all of it positive." But I'm prone to see change as mostly inconvenient. I wish I could be more like Linda, who always tries to see change as an "adventure."

I should say, potential CHANGE. It may be just change, in the small effect. But it is potentially huge CHANGE.

I'm at a point in life where I'm not only dealing with ongoing health issues of a parent, but also of friends and siblings, though thankfully not Linda or me.

Both Linda's store and my store are doing well. We aren't struggling with bills. For most of our career, we didn't have to worry about CHOICE. When you're just covering the basics, it simplifies things.

Oh, we've moved from having to camp or stay at friends houses when we travel to actually staying in a motel. We don't have to check our bank balance every time we
fill the car with gas.

But a big screen T.V. stills seems an unnecessary extravagance to me. We still have to ponder reroofing the house, or putting in a new lawn. We wish we could be more financially helpful to our kids.

Like I said, it's potential change. My wife has another saying, "Don't borrow trouble from the future." But that works against my natural instinct to plan and ponder and prepare.

It's been somewhat unsettling to me. I really like my routine. I feel more centered when there isn't so much activity around me.

I've been averaging reading only a couple books a month lately, which is a drastic reduction. My comic reading has suffered even more.

I'm going to give myself two days off this week. As well as giving myself off Sundays from now on. Linda and I had planned to take 3 days and go to the coast. We had even booked a room. But Linda is dealing with health issues of her sister, and has to fly down the S.F.

So, I'm going to just pile the comics next to my couch and go on a reading binge. Maybe, weather permitting, I'll head out into the hinterlands of the high desert and walk around just to get away. I probably should garden, though because the city gave a warning about our shrubs blocking the sidewalk, we more or less dealt with our disgraceful front lawn last week.

I'm fighting the temptation to open Sunday and or Monday. "Look," says the little devil on my right shoulder. "It'll be extra cash. You can spend it."

"No," says the angel on my left shoulder. "You need to have time to yourself. You need to get away."

Like an addiction, the first few weekends will be the hardest, then it will become routine. And I've told you how much I like routine.

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