Fortunately.

Just found out that downtown Bend is losing it's full time police patrol. To which I have one response:

We had a police patrol?

Boy, I tell you, with all those panhandlers and skateboarders and graphitti, it's the Wild West down there. It's enough to give me boils.

Fortunately, I know this young doctor who works out of his home really cheap. I was on my way, trying to get a hold of him on my cell phone, (he wasn't answering, for some reason) when -- O.K., I admit it I took my eyes off the road for a minute.

Slammed into the back of the KTVZ van. Why were they sitting in the middle of the road, dammit! What were they doing, taking pictures? Just what I need. Publicity.

After I was released from the hospital, (they held me for observation -- they wanted to observe whether I actually had any money and made me sign my house and car over to them if I didn't pay.)

Fortunately, I have credit cards. Sure, they have instituted new terms -- if I take out card from my wallet and look at it, they charge me a fee. If I actually touch the card, they charge me another fee. Actually using the card will mean automatic deposit of my paycheck into their account.

Fortunately, I read the fine print and avoided the "Your First Child Belongs to Us," clause. They wanted a pound of flesh, but fortunately were willing to accept a couple pints of blood.

Well, they can have my car, since it was totaled.

Fortunately, since I'm without transportation for awhile, they have decided to keep the bus system running for the weekends. Apparently, they found out if they sell all the seats in the bus, they can keep them running. Very smart. I've heard the next step is to fire all the drivers and have a volunteer driver from the passengers....which ought to work since it will be the only seat on the bus.

I'd be really depressed, but:

Fortunately, I picked up the paper and read these reassuring headlines: "...worst could be behind us...."

One of our biggest real employers is leaving down, but "officials" say "they'll" survive Cessna's departure. I'm glad "they'll" survive, and I do hope that the officials continue to survive. Can't do without them "officials".

I suppose if everything goes wrong, I'll just go and get another degree. I figure by the time I pay back my student loan, I'll be dead.

Fortunately, 550 people showed up to try to save the local OSU campus. You got to figure -- you know, at least about 10 of them actually go to school up there. Still, lots of people like the 'idea' of a four year college, and that's what counts right?

Fortunately, there is the beautiful spring weather.

NOTE*****

If you aren't reading the local paper the Bulletin everyday, the above post might not make much sense....suffice to say, I did not actually have an accident with the KTVZ van....