Shocked, I tell you!
To find that the guys on Duck Dynasty have homophobic views! (I was so sure they were liberals!!)
That Gov. Christie would play petty politics! (Even more shocked the politics are dirty!!)
That Disney sugar coated the true story of Mary Poppins! (Even more shocked that Disney has sugar coated the story about sugar coating the true story of Mary Poppins!!)
That the Nook isn't selling well! (And even more shocked that a $38.00 tablet from Asia is supposedly in the works!!)
That Santa Claus isn't imaginary, because apparently he's been seen and he's a big fat white guy! (Even more shocked that he isn't anything you want him to be!! By the way. For all you kids out there, the Easter Bunny has brown fur. He just does.)
That the Bitcoin seems to have radically different values from minute to minute! (Even more shocked that gold does!!)
I'm shocked by all the shocked headlines on Huffington Post and Slate and Salon and Business Insider and Buzzfeed and all the others.
Shocked I tell you!!!
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