Friday, December 3, 2010

When a market isn't a market.

"Market hits zoning snag." Bulletin, 12/3/10.

"The people in charge of Bend Indoor Markets, where locals peddle...products do not plan to cooperate with the city in solving a zoning problem at the 2 month old market.

The building...is in an area zoned light industrial, which prohibits uses that are primarily retail."

"But property owners see the issue differently."

"This does not look look like retail," said (the owner).



Err.....I think maybe he doesn't understand the word: "Market."


*****

Monty Python.

A customer enters a pet shop.

Customer: 'Ello, I wish to register a complaint.

O: We're closin' for lunch.

C: Never mind that, my lad. I wish to complain about this parrot what I purchased not half an hour ago from this very boutique.

O: Oh yes, the, uh, the Norwegian Blue...What's,uh...What's wrong with it?

C: I'll tell you what's wrong with it, my lad. 'E's dead, that's what's wrong with it!

O: No, no, 'e's uh,...he's resting.

C: Look, matey, I know a dead parrot when I see one, and I'm looking at one right now.

O: No no he's not dead, he's, he's restin'! Remarkable bird, the Norwegian Blue, idn'it, ay? Beautiful plumage!

C: The plumage don't enter into it. It's stone dead.

O: Nononono, no, no! 'E's resting!

C: All right then, if he's restin', I'll wake him up!

(shouting at the cage)

'Ello, Mister Polly Parrot! I've got a lovely fresh cuttle fish for you if you show...(owner hits the cage)

O: There, he moved!

C: No, he didn't, that was you hitting the cage!

O: I never!!

C: Yes, you did!

2 comments:

Duncan McGeary said...

This seems odd to me. I'm sure the city will be more than accommodating about rezoning -- unless...they aren't.

Still, denying you're retail is just silly.

Anonymous said...

I noted the lovely add for the "Market" in the Go section today...nice list of products advertised - all of them retail. I am with you Duncan...they should just re-zone the site (and put in the appropriate improvements to handle the traffic), or get a special "we don't need this as Industrial right now so we will have a limited use (weekends) retail usage and have the appropriate traffic and parking controls (like Westside Church has)" permit. The City can't really back down now since if something goes wrong (someone gets hit after parking in the bike lane because of inadequate parking)...the City suffers liability since they have identified it as an non-conforming use. Denying it is retail generated some good laughs this morning though....