Sub-conscious figurings.

O.K. Why so many nightmares since about mid-December? I don't usually get nightmares.

Well, stress, for sure.

But more, I honestly believe my subconscious doesn't trust when things are going too well.

"Don't get complacent, Bub."

**********

Priorities.

I went into a downtown merchants store on Christmas Eve, and said: "You win. You're the biggest workaholic! I'm going home!" (This was about 6:00.) "How was your Christmas?"

"We had a great Christmas," the owner replied.

"Well, that's great. We hit last's years totals, so I'm really happy..."

"Oh, you mean sales? I meant, my family was all home for Christmas and we had a wonderful time! Sales at the store were down by Half."

"Um....Oh," I said.

I really don't communicate with other downtowners well. It's always like we're talking at cross purposes. I'm just a little too obsessive about business. (You think?) Then again, maybe that's why I'm still around.

**********

Speaking of which -- I'm getting the distinct impression that most merchants in Bend maybe didn't do quite as well as I did. So I need to keep my mouth shut. (See above comment: "Don't get complacent, Bub!")

It was definitely luck that boardgames had a big year and I was able to tap into it. Just one of those things. There have been more than enough times in my career when I was doing horrible while everyone around me was doing great, so I don't put much stock in it.

**********

Speaking of subconscious. There is a weird calculator in my head.

I just added up debts and revenues and they almost EXACTLY match. Not only for the month of December, but for the entire year.

Of course, you might say. It's just budgeting.

Yeah, but what if your budget includes material you ordered six months ago, three months ago, last month, and last week? What if your "fill" rate (material you ordered which actually show up) varies from 50% to 90%?

What, in other words, happens if you ordered a truckload of chocolate ice cream, and everyone wants vanilla?

Meanwhile, you are completely trying to guess how much the customer will spend, which is only slightly less difficult than predicting the weather.

Matching your orders to actual sales is more an art than a science. You can budget and calculate all you want -- won't matter if things don't happen the way you think they will. And things never happen the way you think it will.

So how is it even possible that I can hit January 1, 2011 with exactly as much money as I need to pay off all the bills?

The last two weeks before Christmas, for instance, are total chaos. I'm buying and selling on the fly -- I have no real idea if things are matching.

But subconsciously, I must be doing some calculating. This is a very subtle thing.


Here's what I think it is. Practice, practice, practice. I'm typing these days ten times faster than I typed 20 years ago, or 40 years ago when I took a typing class in high school. I watch my fingers moving over the keyboard, and I'm not thinking about it, I'm simply doing it.

I have as similar knack of being able to calculate volume of product and space in the store, and how it can all be accommodated. I don't have time -- hell, most of the time I don't know -- to actually measure the dimensions of what's coming in. I just know whether it will fit or not.

Again, I think this is just practice. Doing it every day.

If you do something long enough, and often enough, you pick up a few tricks.