Saturday, June 22, 2019

One step better, two steps further from perfect.

Finished the final rewrite of "Takeover." That doesn't mean I won't do a bit of rewriting here and there over the next month, while Lara is editing it, but I've done a top to bottom edit and I think improved it. If nothing else, I've smoothed away the inconsistencies.

I can't tell if it's any good. Ironically, the very process of trying to improve it makes me doubt it more. After a first draft, when I think I've told my story, I can maintain the illusion that it's great. But once I start editing, then all the flaws come to the surface. The more I try to fix it, the more I see.

But here's the thing. I am actually improving the story even as--the longer I do it--the more doubts I have. I've never talked to another writer who feels this way.

I remember one of the first pros I ever talked to said, "Why would you let your book go before it was perfect?"

And I remember just saying, "Perfect?" like it was a word I never heard before.

So it's perfect after the first draft--in my mind, if not in reality. After I've actually improved it, it's far less than perfect. Does that make sense?

I don't want to lose my enjoyment of writing in pursuit of perfection--which is ridiculous anyway.

I have to remember the rosy glow of that first story-telling, and then hard-headedly improve the writing.

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