Starting over.

I'm trying to figure out if I have the guts to completely ditch what I've written on Gangster Gothic and start over. It seems so radical.

And yet, I have faith in my ability to write. It will allow me to put down the plot in the order in which I think it should occur, allow me to start with the proper tone, allow me to flesh out the characters I've already lived with.

Then, I can go back and pick bits of previous writing that I think will fit into the new framework, either as replacement or addition.

Two chances to get it right.

Or one chance to really screw it up.

I have to remember in the scheme of things I'm in no big hurry to produce another book, and if I'm going to do so I should make it as good as I can.

Sure, I can sit down and produce a book every few months but why? I've got a bunch of novels waiting to be rewritten. I've even got several novels that are ready to be put out. (With my new publishers, I don't want to step on their toes for the relaunches, so I'm holding back.)

This lack of urgency is both relaxing and worryingly relaxing. That is, I've always had to impose some artificial pressure on myself. My writing schedule was never imposed from the outside, it was always an illusion that I needed to get it done.

There was the saved up creative energy from not writing for 25 years--sure. There was the fear that something would happen that would keep me from finishing books.

But I've now got 14 books out published by publishers, another one coming out (a ghostwritten book that I'll never be able to talk about unfortunately); 5 books and 3 short stories I've put out myself, with at least 3 more ready to go, and another half dozen as I said that just require a little clean up.

So that self-imposed discipline from an illusionary pressure has pretty much eased.

So I'm thinking--live with this story for awhile. Put it in the crock pot and let it simmer.

Just try to remember to actually finish it.