It's taken six months, but I think I've gotten back to normal about, you know, mortality and all that.
The trick is to put it in the back of my mind, not to think about it. After all, what's really changed? I mean, really, I'm as healthy or unhealthy as I was before, nor am I compelled to make huge changes. I'm trying to keep the weight off and walk everyday, but I was already doing that.
The heart clogging up? Well, it's going to do that whether I'm paying attention to it or not. If I feel any of the danger signs, do something about it, but other than that, get on with it.
So yeah, it's pretty much back to normal.
I've also stopped worrying about writing. I'll get back to it when I'm ready.
Meanwhile, I've returned to working at Pegasus Books on Sundays and Mondays. Just put my first two days in--and it was exhausting but also kinda fun. I was missing it. I like interacting with people in my own space, talking books, talking Bend.
The foot traffic is pretty amazing. By staying in the same place for 38 years or so, the world caught up to us. Pegasus Books itself will be hitting 40 years come next year. I probably ought to do something about that since I'm unlikely to be still running the place in another 10 years.
Across from us, Wendy at Trivia Antiques is moving out. It's one of two businesses on my block that started about the same time as I bought Pegasus. (The other is Kitchen Complements; I don't think Diane is going anywhere.)
I bought the store just a couple of months before them, so I still claim to be the oldest existing retail business downtown in the same location under the same ownership. (April, 1984 if anyone has anyone who can beat that.)
I've been lucky with my landlords. I've been lucky overall.
Books and graphic novels are selling great, representing 2/3rds sales. Enough of a mix that I can adjust to circumstances.
Funny thing about going back to work--and I can already see it happening--is that I'll have to watch out for the budget. Being there more often means I'll probably be ordering more--instead of just assigning a budget and asking Sabrina to stick to it--or not being there and not realizing what I'm missing. Heh.
Anyway, I still like what I'm doing. If I was in danger or burning out ten years ago, I think that danger is past. I'm rested and excited by the changes to the store and ready to go. Knock wood.
6 days ago