Was having a long conversation with myself about where my writing is going.
It's sort of dying off where I haven't done any promoting. My self-publishing career is dead in the water. I think the books are just as good, but as far as sales are concerned, it doesn't matter what I think.
I have three books coming out with publishers over the next year--I think. Two of the publishers are new for me.
I'm writing for a publisher a book that I have lots of doubts about. So I was working through that and by accident asked myself the question: "Do YOU like the book?"
And the answer is a most definite: "Yes, yes I do."
I mean, I still have to pop the ending and I'm asking my subconscious to come up with a corker, but even the ending I have so far isn't bad.
In every case where I question the direction of the book, it's been because of some sort of awareness in my head that what I'm doing might not work with the publisher.
But I think it's very, very dangerous to write to other's expectation.
"Do YOU like the book?"
"Yes, yes I do."
I like the characters, the plot, the setting, the writing. I like the measured beginning, the middle alone-part, the quirkiness of the Bulletproof Bigfoot costume being another character in the book.
I like the relationship between Nicole and Hart. I like the McGuffin. I like the premise. I like the somewhat goofy humor (always amazes me that I write that goofy stuff.) All these are somewhat problematic commercially.
So far in my writing I've written what I want to write when I want to write it--and only then have I asked myself where I could place what I've written.
When I was told by the "big-time" agent to write "100 kickass" pages," I tried to write it the way I thought he would want it. I took out a couple of chapters, changed the beginning, and moved chapters around.
He rejected it outright. So I went ahead and wrote it anyway, the way I wanted, restoring the original story, and it was this book that the bigger publisher took.
I know in my business that I decided a long time ago to do what I wanted, instead of always chasing the almighty buck, and build on the small successes because in the end I had to live with the store on a daily basis, and doing it for money only was a recipe for burn-out.
My attitude to writing from the beginning was "Just write it. Don't question it, trust your subconscious, have fun."
So I need to ask that question more often, instead of getting hung up on other things.
"Do YOU like the book?"
"Why, yes. Thank you for asking."